Person Structures (PS)
I am learning to recognize a few different personalities within me. Ofcourse I dont think so this is anyway related to multiple personality disorder or something. Its just the different sets of "person structures" (PS) within me, wherein a person structure consists of a particular understanding of the world situation, and a particular direction of thought and action.
I am feeling that my troubles were basically because of not recognizing those person structures. And there were being overlaps, and conflicts between these structurs which I was not able to handle. I was not understanding what I am, and had terrible identity confusion.
But now I am feeling more and more confident that I will now be able to lead a happy life, by maximizing use of inner resources. ( Yes "maximizing use of inner resources" appears to be a good way of leading a happy life -- but actually it is more a personal fulfillment objective. I will be able to personally fulfill myself. But here this personal fulfillment will contain things which actually do not belong to the personal fulfillment category. So here is something to think about ... that even the things wich are not personal fulfillment related are coming under personal fulfillment -- i might have been confused about this term then -- i will have to choose between one definition of personal fulfillment -- whether personal fulfillment should be related to actions that are done for personal survival and enjoyment, hence everything that is ego-driven, or whether personal fulfillment is related to actions which one "wants to do" regardless of whether they correlate with personal survival and personal enjoyment. For example, a person may have altruistic tendencies and even masochistic tendencies. Are these ego-driven? Where should we place them? [incomplete] )
Ok the problem with these personal structures is that people will befriend only one person structure, and then I have problems completely relating to them because only a part of me is befriending them. And I couldnt tell them the problems in the other person structures because of they were not completely aware of them. Of course, and this caused problem in relationships, also because they were confused about who I am. My thoughts and actions were did not fit a logical self. Now I will have to think of revealing to them, more clearly, that I have other personal structures present -- and also I will have to control my existence in all these personal structures very well. I will have to understand that I do have these somewhat conflicting PS's and that it is natural for me to befriend people using one PS and not others. I will have to choose, and be in general more control about myself. I think after recognizing these PS's I am feeling better about myself. In other words, I will have to do "personal structures management'", or in short "personal management", which many people are good at.
Lets dive.
Person structure 1: narcissism
This provides all the "recognition" clauses to other PS's .
Person structure 2: love, family, sacrifice, closeness, oneness, etc :recognition - "love, sympathy"
This is a structure which has been formed over a long time remaining in a family and somewhat friends as well. In this, I love everybody. I think that love is the best emotion. I feel no difference between me and everybody else. I feel one with everybody. I feel that all people's troubles are my troubles. And that I should help everybody. I like family. I like when people can coexist and be mutually happy. "Mutual growth" of happiness -- I love it. I like sacrifice, when one person sacrifices his own, in order to keep the other happy. This specializes in completely ridding myself of any ego, and just finding happiness in making other people happy. And loving them. The "self" is given so low importance here, that I almost am masochistically helping people out.
The recognition that I seek in this PS is of "love". If other people love me, I am happy. I they do not, then I am very unhappy.
Person structure 3: friends, fun, enjoyment, adventure :recognition- "recognition of ability to serve as good company to other people, people should like me frienshipwise"
In this PS, I try to enjoy, have fun, enjoy with friends, go for adventure, etc. There is no need to describe this -- everybody in the world is famililar with this.
The recognition I see in this is to want that other people like me and enjoy my company, and want to befriend me.
Person structure 4: analyzing non-technical like psychological, spiritual, philosophical : recognition based on "awe, praise"
This is a crazy PS that I have -- which is highly abnormal. Here I try to analyze everything including behavior, purpose of life, philosophy, spirituality, psychology, etc. In this I have found too many answers which are more than healthy. For example, I found out it is possible to psychologically explain why everybody wants to find a job, wants to have a family, and almost everything else that a person wants, and never thinks about why he wants that. After finding the reasons, the desires appear to be no longer attractive. I found that ego is the basic driver behind everything, and since ego is the nothing but a result of evolution because of survival, everything is pointless. In this PS I analyze philosophical and spiritual reasons as well. For example, I found out that spirituality is nothing but going towards egolessness, which requires detachment from normal societal life, since everything that is done in society is ego-based. My recent Asaramji Bapu's sadhana shibir confirmed this.
Person structure 5: analyzing technical :recognition based on "awe, praise"
This is where I enjoy logical and analytically analyzing and indulging in technology, programming, science etc. (all the normal fields) This helps me do good in jobs, and studies (if I can subside other PS's and gather some will power from PS6).
Person structure 6: surviving, ego, self, personal fulfillment, growth, meeting targets, goals, achievement, getting what you want :recognition - success, fame, ability to create a survivable environment
This is what generally is a good drive for most normal people. in my case, this has subsided recently because of my strange beliefs/conclusions from PS4. In this PS, I will do somethings like aim for things I like, perform better, grow,
Now, these days, my dominating PS's were PS1 and PS4, both of which are very harmful. I need to get back to PS6, PS5, PS3, and PS2 in order to become normal and happier.
And I need to get them into a stable and long lasting mixture, so that I become a constant person and not a person with many heads.
Now I am finding that my intense identity confusion is reducing ... and I will try to tackle the interrelationships between these PSs more swiftly.
(Is this this separation good into PSs? Will this be a problem? Is a unified self better, like most people are?)
(incomplete)
I am feeling that my troubles were basically because of not recognizing those person structures. And there were being overlaps, and conflicts between these structurs which I was not able to handle. I was not understanding what I am, and had terrible identity confusion.
But now I am feeling more and more confident that I will now be able to lead a happy life, by maximizing use of inner resources. ( Yes "maximizing use of inner resources" appears to be a good way of leading a happy life -- but actually it is more a personal fulfillment objective. I will be able to personally fulfill myself. But here this personal fulfillment will contain things which actually do not belong to the personal fulfillment category. So here is something to think about ... that even the things wich are not personal fulfillment related are coming under personal fulfillment -- i might have been confused about this term then -- i will have to choose between one definition of personal fulfillment -- whether personal fulfillment should be related to actions that are done for personal survival and enjoyment, hence everything that is ego-driven, or whether personal fulfillment is related to actions which one "wants to do" regardless of whether they correlate with personal survival and personal enjoyment. For example, a person may have altruistic tendencies and even masochistic tendencies. Are these ego-driven? Where should we place them? [incomplete] )
Ok the problem with these personal structures is that people will befriend only one person structure, and then I have problems completely relating to them because only a part of me is befriending them. And I couldnt tell them the problems in the other person structures because of they were not completely aware of them. Of course, and this caused problem in relationships, also because they were confused about who I am. My thoughts and actions were did not fit a logical self. Now I will have to think of revealing to them, more clearly, that I have other personal structures present -- and also I will have to control my existence in all these personal structures very well. I will have to understand that I do have these somewhat conflicting PS's and that it is natural for me to befriend people using one PS and not others. I will have to choose, and be in general more control about myself. I think after recognizing these PS's I am feeling better about myself. In other words, I will have to do "personal structures management'", or in short "personal management", which many people are good at.
Lets dive.
Person structure 1: narcissism
This provides all the "recognition" clauses to other PS's .
This is a structure which has been formed over a long time remaining in a family and somewhat friends as well. In this, I love everybody. I think that love is the best emotion. I feel no difference between me and everybody else. I feel one with everybody. I feel that all people's troubles are my troubles. And that I should help everybody. I like family. I like when people can coexist and be mutually happy. "Mutual growth" of happiness -- I love it. I like sacrifice, when one person sacrifices his own, in order to keep the other happy. This specializes in completely ridding myself of any ego, and just finding happiness in making other people happy. And loving them. The "self" is given so low importance here, that I almost am masochistically helping people out.
The recognition that I seek in this PS is of "love". If other people love me, I am happy. I they do not, then I am very unhappy.
Person structure 3: friends, fun, enjoyment, adventure :recognition- "recognition of ability to serve as good company to other people, people should like me frienshipwise"
In this PS, I try to enjoy, have fun, enjoy with friends, go for adventure, etc. There is no need to describe this -- everybody in the world is famililar with this.
The recognition I see in this is to want that other people like me and enjoy my company, and want to befriend me.
Person structure 4: analyzing non-technical like psychological, spiritual, philosophical : recognition based on "awe, praise"
This is a crazy PS that I have -- which is highly abnormal. Here I try to analyze everything including behavior, purpose of life, philosophy, spirituality, psychology, etc. In this I have found too many answers which are more than healthy. For example, I found out it is possible to psychologically explain why everybody wants to find a job, wants to have a family, and almost everything else that a person wants, and never thinks about why he wants that. After finding the reasons, the desires appear to be no longer attractive. I found that ego is the basic driver behind everything, and since ego is the nothing but a result of evolution because of survival, everything is pointless. In this PS I analyze philosophical and spiritual reasons as well. For example, I found out that spirituality is nothing but going towards egolessness, which requires detachment from normal societal life, since everything that is done in society is ego-based. My recent Asaramji Bapu's sadhana shibir confirmed this.
Person structure 5: analyzing technical :recognition based on "awe, praise"
This is where I enjoy logical and analytically analyzing and indulging in technology, programming, science etc. (all the normal fields) This helps me do good in jobs, and studies (if I can subside other PS's and gather some will power from PS6).
Person structure 6: surviving, ego, self, personal fulfillment, growth, meeting targets, goals, achievement, getting what you want :recognition - success, fame, ability to create a survivable environment
This is what generally is a good drive for most normal people. in my case, this has subsided recently because of my strange beliefs/conclusions from PS4. In this PS, I will do somethings like aim for things I like, perform better, grow,
Now, these days, my dominating PS's were PS1 and PS4, both of which are very harmful. I need to get back to PS6, PS5, PS3, and PS2 in order to become normal and happier.
And I need to get them into a stable and long lasting mixture, so that I become a constant person and not a person with many heads.
Now I am finding that my intense identity confusion is reducing ... and I will try to tackle the interrelationships between these PSs more swiftly.
(Is this this separation good into PSs? Will this be a problem? Is a unified self better, like most people are?)
(incomplete)
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