spending time avoiding social disapprovals

I tend to spend a LOT of time thinking about how to avoid failure (like failing to fulfill what people, both strangers and acquaintances, expect me to do; basically failing to get social approval) and how to patch past failures; in fact I do not spend as much time on anything else.

Actually, almost all of my behavior is centered around avoiding social disapprovals.

I get most happy when I am able to successfully avoid a possible big social disapproval.


I must think more about constructive ways to enrich and fulfill myself, rather than possible social approval failures, and those will automatically reduce possibly if I stop thinking about them.

But hard to do; its not easy to give up a hard-embibed habit. Its stuck.


I think if I stop thinking about them, and think about direct positive self-enrichment, and fulfillment; I will be able to get to my real social self; and break it free from the shell, right into open social space.